One Ring To Rule Them All…

First and foremost, this piece is a review on the specific (and quite frankly, excellent) Primal Ring. At the end of this post I have provided some background information on cockrings in general, from how they work, to how to measure, and how to use safely.

Why am I still writing?

The recent global environment is difficult.

My day-job involves addressing and managing the current situation – trying to keep people safe and healthy. This has meant that my blog, and my passion for writing reviews on adult products for men, has been on hiatus for longer than I would have liked.

I created menstoytester because I couldn’t find entertaining, informative, reviews or information on adult toys aimed at penis-owners. This hasn’t changed, and I still want to share my opinions with other like-minded individuals across the globe. It’s just taken a while to get some available time to support this work… and I appreciate everyone who continues to read, message, email, and support menstoytester.com.

Sadly, men interested in adult toys are treated as though they are the kind of people you catch masturbating at a sleepover, and they don’t stop.

‘Sex-toys’ have long been associated with hidden seedy stores behind dark curtains… glowing red lights beckoning the ‘lonely’ or ‘degenerate’ inside to peruse and purchase supplies of lube, dirty magazines / videos, and all manner of rubber / silicone / metal / battery-operated insertables before hurriedly scarpering away with their brown paper bag, hoping that no-one they know saw them either enter or leave.

While this may still be the experience of some, as society becomes more accepting of sexuality and open to the idea that personal pleasure is nothing to be ashamed of, adult stores are becoming more visible. Adult outlets on the high-street, toys stocked in suburban shopping malls alongside BDSM inspired lingerie, non-gender-specific products designed for use by any and all interested in experimenting or enhancing their sexual experience.

Whilst many toys have historically been aimed at vagina owner-operators, more and more products are being developed and offered for the penis-clad among us.

Cockrings… bringing joy since the dawn of time

Perhaps the most well known penis accoutrement is the cock ring, which has remained mostly unchanged (design wise) since its inception in China over 2000 years ago (so not quite the dawn of time).

Throughout its history, the cock-ring has been a pretty ‘utilitarian’ design… whether metal, leather, or silicone… the device is about as simple as they come. A constrictive ring designed to be worn around the base of the penis to limit blood flow, resulting in stronger and harder erections (or even assisting those battling the effects of ED). Sure, there are a couple of variations on the theme… with soft or hard versions, adjustable straps, ratchets and snaps… but for the most part if you’ve seen one cock ring, you’ve pretty much seen them all.

But not now.

Now we have the Primal Ring, and I can tell you it’s an absolute game changer.

Personally, I have a love-hate relationship with cock-rings. Most of the ones I have experienced in the past have fallen into the ‘cheap / shit’ category… flimsy pieces of stretchy silicone that woefully underperformed. Even when stepping up into stainless steel / more expensive / higher quality, rings… I was left disappointed by the fit and comfort level. There’s very little room for error in the metal cock-ring world… too large and its useless, too small and you run the risk of injury or embarrassment.

I’ve previously written about the jnaja ring… an interesting design, created to fit closer to the body for all day use, with a short arm on the base for perineal stimulation. (Read the full review here)

I like the jnaja, but it does let you down a little on its promise of ‘long term wear’. You see, the product has a slightly rough texture as a result of the 3D printing manufacturing process. Like your favourite jeans, it’s designed to wear and fade in an individual manner dependent upon how its used. This is pretty cool in theory – who wouldn’t want a custom piece of dick jewellery?

And the jnaja does a great job of the core function of a cock-ring… I can attest to how much my wife enjoys it when I have it on. The product allows you to easily achieve a rock hard and thick dick… all smooth, shiny, and veiny (not sure that’s a word)… but try to wear longer term and you will find that the previously mentioned texture starts to chafe and rub in all the wrong ways. Especially on the perineal arm.

As a result, I haven’t been able to wear the jnaja often enough, or for long enough, to comment on its intended personalised fading. It’s fun in short / medium bursts, but long term use just makes you yearn for something better.

As a result, I have spent considerable time researching and seeking a better cock-ring. Something that not only delivers in the constriction department, but that is also comfortable to wear for extended periods. Additionally, a cock-ring is essentially a piece of body jewellery, designed to be seen by someone you (hopefully) care about… so finding a product that is aesthetically pleasing would be a bonus.

To recap… I want a cock ring:

• Made from metal
• Fits comfortably
• High quality
• Affordable
• Excellent, but safe, constriction
• Can be worn both during times of fun, but also for longer periods
• Looks beautiful

That’s a fair bit to ask from an item that, as we’ve discussed, has remained remarkably unchanged for 2 millennia.

Turns out everything I wanted was actually currently available. I just needed to discover Primal Rings.

Primal Rings provided me with the products to review. They didn’t seek me out… they were not even aware that menstoytester existed. I found their product during the aforementioned search, and reached out to them to ask if they would be interested in me writing about their design. They took a chance and sent me two rings for testing.

Noting that they are not a huge company – and giving away your products to a stranger just because he asked via an email is probably a difficult decision to explain to your accountant (especially when you have no control over what is going to be written) – I was impressed to see them backing their products to deliver.

As usual, I do not use affiliate links nor take any ‘kickbacks’ from purchases made. The opinions stated here are my own, and are not influenced by the manufacturer, producer, marketer, mailman.

Long story short… these things are amazing. You could stop reading my review right now and just head over to primalrings.com and purchase your own, and I can guarantee you would be as happy as an international tourist escaping quarantine lockdown.

Design

Holy shit… just look at this thing…

… now tell me that’s not gorgeous.

It’s like the Maserati of penis accoutrements.

As I’ve written above… most cockrings tend to be very utilitarian, very plain. Purchasing a standard cockring is a lot like opening Uber Eats at 1am and having to decide which gas station you want a sausage roll delivered from… you wish there was a better option but you just have to deal with the choices you’ve got.

They tend to be cheap, nasty, poorly fitting things. I’ve had metal ones with a very obvious ‘join’ in the middle of the ring that can pinch and catch, silicone rings with so much stretch you may as well be wearing nothing, and too many to count (no matter what the material used) that are simply so uncomfortable that they detract from the entire experience.

So, you can imagine my elation at finding the Primal Ring. In speaking with Peter (the owner/founder of Primal Rings) his experience of cock rings mirrored my own:

“… we’re cock ring fanatics and among us we own hundreds of round rings in different materials, styles, and colours. But all of them suffer from a few flaws, including pinching and rubbing. Plus, since traditional round rings don’t match the curve of your body, they have a tendency to slide down and cover up some of your length. So we started from a blank slate and let the male anatomy guide us to the right design…”

I think I love Peter… I’m not ashamed… He is my new FAVOURITE person.

The ergonomic ‘S’ shape design of the Primal Ring is absolutely amazing… these guys got it exactly right. The subtle curve of the product aligns beautifully against your body, creating a snug and comfortable fit that looks amazing.

Additionally, the design incorporates a small ‘teardrop’ curve at the base (Primal calls it the ‘keyhole’) allows the ring to sit perfectly behind your balls. No pinching, bunching, rubbing, chafing, or any other kind of discomfort. It does everything you want a cock ring to do – harder, thicker erections – whilst completely overcoming all of the downsides of other (inferior) offerings.

Beautifully weighted, the Primal rings are light enough to remain comfortable for long periods, but retain enough heft to constantly remind you that you’re wearing something special.

In short, they are the perfect cock product.

You can tell they are premium pieces of kit… not just from a design perspective, but from the quality of the manufacturing. Whilst many adult toys are now offered in stainless steel, the standards can be variable. Not so with the Primal Ring… the stainless steel is beautifully finished, gorgeously polished and reflective, with not a dent or blemish to be found. More than this, you can also get the Primal Ring in shiny black, or your choice of matte silver or black.

As someone who enjoys detailing cars when I get the time… I know what an absolute exercise in futility it is to try to and hide a manufacturing defect or fault in a matte finish. The matte silver on my Primal Ring is truely a wonder to behold… smooth and beautiful. 

It takes pride of place in my bedside drawer… and for a man who reviews adult toys as a side-gig, that’s saying something.

Why Use A Cockring?

At the risk of patronising you, dear reader, there are many reasons to add the joy of a quality cockring into your sexual arsenal.

• Greater Stamina – They can help you last longer
• Erectile Support – Every bloke, no matter what he tells you, has experienced ‘the droops’ at some stage. And if you haven’t yet, you will eventually. The cockring traps blood in the penis, keeping it harder for longer. Some individuals who cannot achieve a full erection under their own power (for a variety of reasons, this is a safe space), can pair a cockring with a vacuum (or penis) pump. However, its doesn’t have to be that extreme for you to enjoy the benefits of a quality cockring… even if you have no issue with getting hard generally, who would scoff at the opportunity to dial their erection up to 11?
• Stimulation – As I stated above, my wife loves the addition of a quality cockring to our sessions. They create a completely different texture to your penis if worn correctly, creating pronounced veins and ridges and can make you genuinely as hard as rock.
• Sensation – I’ve seen articles stating that this is all psychosomatic – simply being aware of using a cockring can make you think that it all feels differently. I don’t subscribe to this way of thinking… I honestly experience sexual sensations more acutely with the Primal Ring.

Primal Rings even run their own blog, where they have a couple of pieces relating to Cock Rings 101.

A Primal How To – Measuring

Primal Rings provide a handy sizing guide on their website, some of which I have included below :

Primal advises that most penis-owners are in the 40-50mm range.

They also highly recommend that, even if you already have a well fitting cockring, measure against their guide. The ‘S’ design and the teardrop will make it different to anything you have tried before, and you want the best possible outcome.

A Primal How To – Wearing

• Most importantly, position the ring so that the ‘P’ is facing away from you at the top (so your partner / friend / webcam can easily see the letter)
• Slip one testicle through, starting with the lowest hanging one
• Insert your second testicle
• Tuck your shaft down and through the ring
• Pull the ring as close to your body as is comfortable
• Success!

Remember some key safety pointers:

• Don’t wear a ring that is too tight (remember the jaws of life?)
• If you feel discomfort, tingling, numbness, significant changes in colour… remove it
• Only wear for a length of time that you are experienced with… too long without allowing the blood to ‘refresh’ can cause damage. For example, don’t try to sleep in one 🙂
• Don’t be stupid

Final Verdict

Just go and get one… cockrings are one of the most accessible, acceptable, and cost effective additions any bloke can make to his toolbag.

Now, you may be tempted to buy a cheaper product from your local store, or ebay, or online adult shop – thinking that you are being a savvy consumer.

Don’t… I subscribe to the ‘buy once, buy right’ approach to life… and I can assure you that you could spend hundreds on alternate products and still not have as great an experience as if you had just purchased a Primal Ring. I can guarantee this.